Saturday, May 19, 2012
"In Him is Fullnes of Joy"
Fullness,
My life is filled to fullness right now.
Fullness of joy, fullness of time, fullness of mind, completeness.
And I saw today that when my life is full, I notice others emptiness more.
This week I had to decide if I should go somewhere, somewhere my mind told me was desperately important to go... when I stepped back logically and looked at it I discovered there was no way I could possibly do it, so I decided not to go. Because of fullness of time.
I slept until around nine today then helped Mom in the garden for a bit. I cleaned the house and then went to a piano recital where a friend was performing. When I got home my mother and sister and I filled our book bags and bicycled to the Grindstone beach where we unexpectedly met a couple of girls that came to NBCC years ago. I didn't recognize them at first but as they drove away one of the girls leaned out of the window and yelled back, "I love you Francis!"... I've discovered that to the worlds love is meaningless. I could have answered truthfully back that I loved her as well, but she wouldn't have understood.
A short while later three little girls came and were splashing in the water, Amy and I went out to join them and we spent a happy hour splashing and talking. At one point a couple of the girls and I formed a "friendship circle", "now, one, two, three, GO!", and we all dived. And you know what? That friendship circle felt more real to me than the I love you. There was a simple, innocent, sincerity in it. And my heart was filled again, I was being included, without question, in their circle. But a little while later when I walked to the shoreline to talk to one of the little girls I noticed her scarred feet... "My stepmother burned them when I was two"... And my heart hurt for her.
The girls followed us a little way home just to be with us and after they left Mom told me something else about that little girl that made me hurt. Someone had dropped her off at a friends house yesterday. And by today she'd discovered that she would have to stay there till Monday after school when the bus dropped her off at home, "because her Mom didn't know where her friend lived".
After we got home from the lake Mom sent my siblings and I down to the Log Cabin store on our bicycles to find bread for our supper. On the way we met a neighbor boy who is about seven or so I'd say. We said hello and went on our way. During supper he showed up wondering where Brad was and if he'd come play. Brad couldn't at the time so he started walking home, when he was a little way from our house a firecracker went off loudly, and absolutely terrified him. He started running in the opposite direction and I can honestly say that I've never seen a child run so fast.
I went to see if he was alright and by the time I got to where I thought he would be he was nearly out of sight down the road. I knew his friends had gone down that way so I let him go, but it hurt. Such complete terror in a child is disturbing right to the soul.
I got a call this morning wondering if I'd clean for a lady who has two little dogs and a married daughter... No husband, and her life is empty, you can tell it just by looking at her house, and herself. I'm cleaning there Monday morning. This afternoon I got a call wondering if I'd clean out some flowerbeds for a different lady on Monday afternoon. I always have such fun cleaning/doing odd jobs for this lady because her life and heart, are full. Tomorrow I'm going to my very own church and a friend said they'd teach Children's Sunday School for me so that I can attend the ladies class which is something I've missed allot during my time teaching. In the afternoon we are going to a hymn-sing at friends house, I've been looking forward to it allot.
Tuesday I'm to clean at a huge lodge in the morning, in the afternoon I'm teaching piano lessons... And packing. Early Wednesday morning my family is leaving for Idaho. This will be the first family trip we've taken out there in about ten years. And I'm looking forward to it allot.
So you see my life is full. Wonderfully, happily, full. But I'm an adult, and fullness is an overflowing of many blessings. What about those children? Why did God give me joy and give them hurt? Maybe my overflowing of blessing is meant to be poured into prayers and love for them.
Where does your fullness overflow?
~Francis
Wednesday, April 11, 2012
Happy and the Meaning Thereof
Blessed, blest, blissful, blithe, can't complain, captivated, cheerful, chipper, chirpy, content, contented, convivial, delighted, ecstatic, elated, exultant, flying high, gay, glad, gleeful, gratified, intoxicated, jolly, joyful, joyous, jubilant, laughing, light, lively, looking good, merry, mirthful, on cloud nine, overjoyed, peaceful, peppy, perky, playful, pleasant, pleased, sparkling, sunny, thrilled, tickled, tickled pink, up, upbeat, walking on air.-~thesaurus.com~
Those are all synonyms of the word happy. Apparently there are thousands of words that mean happy because a picture is worth a thousand words all of these pictures mean happy to me. :-)
A Springtime Table-scape
I’ve been looking at this fabric in a tourist shoppe on Main Street for months and finally a couple of weeks ago I bought it. I made a skirt of it last Friday and Saturday night I wore it on a date with this good looking brother of mine. I had a positively lovely time. Thank you Lance.
These are two of the most darling children in the world. I've been trying to talk Lisl and Dru into letting me keep “Halla Baby” until I go visit them next winter. They are not easily persuaded I'm afraid!
I found the train set in the storage room a week or so ago and Jube enjoyed it for a day or two. We're going to take it with to Chicago Club this weekend along with our other, higher quality, set.
Gabe's are getting here tomorrow and we are all heading over to Chicago Club for the weekend. I'm really, really looking forward to it, as is the rest of the family. And now I must go sew another skirt and pack for the weekend.
Have a lovely weekend! ~Francis
Wednesday, April 4, 2012
This Is Not A List
This is not a list, this is a documentary of important happenings in my life lately.
Thing One ~ Sunshiny weather and the-return-of-the-horrible-hayfever.
Thing Two ~ Dru's home and lots of happy times playing with babies and talking.
Thing Three ~ We moved NBCC to the Northwoods Church and split into two classes. It went wonderfully, other than one of the girls being sick, coming anyways, and then having to be taken home early.
Thing Four ~ I've been hearing about lots of new dating couples, and it's startling to realize that the people who are dating are my peers, goodness!!!
Thing Five ~ Teaching (still) Enjoying It (still). I had a lovely brainstorm today, I want to take DJ and Gin over to Minong and show them the fire tower and the river and my Dad's machine and take them out for icecream sometime before school lets out. We shall see if it actually happens.
DJ informed me today that if I taught his class in VBS he'd actually stay for the last day. This after stating emphatically, "I HATE the last day!". He also told me "I'm kinda used of you teaching us now". I'm like, wow, it took you five months!
Nadina likes to stretch as far up as she can reach and open our classroom door up, peak in at us with a grin, and quickly run away. DJ, Gin and I all get stupid grins on our faces and say in unison "Dina" in a cute little baby voice. Then we look at each other and smirk because we all did the same thing, we all rise to our feet to go shut the door, look at each other and smirk again, and then Gin goes and closes the door.
It happens at least once a day, you'd think we'd learn!
We were sitting in the class room today and we suddenly heard Nina shouting up the register at us. I listened for a minute and decided that it was unrecognizable jibber-jabber and continued with what I was doing.
Gin however, got a silly grin on her face and said "she's singin' that song". I asked her what song and she said "that, it's your ooown fault, ya went ahead an' did it, song!". I listened for a little longer and discovered that she was right. How many of you have ever tried to teach while listening to "it's your own fault" being yelled full throatedly up the register? DJ found it utterly unbearable and resorted to hollering back down the register at her. I told him if we ignored her she'd go away and he got an "I'm considering this" look on his face and went back to his desk. I was right by the way.
Thing Six ~ I like being right.
The End ~ (As in, nothing comes after this, and the story is over, and all that other good stuff).
Thing One ~ Sunshiny weather and the-return-of-the-horrible-hayfever.
Thing Two ~ Dru's home and lots of happy times playing with babies and talking.
Thing Three ~ We moved NBCC to the Northwoods Church and split into two classes. It went wonderfully, other than one of the girls being sick, coming anyways, and then having to be taken home early.
Thing Four ~ I've been hearing about lots of new dating couples, and it's startling to realize that the people who are dating are my peers, goodness!!!
Thing Five ~ Teaching (still) Enjoying It (still). I had a lovely brainstorm today, I want to take DJ and Gin over to Minong and show them the fire tower and the river and my Dad's machine and take them out for icecream sometime before school lets out. We shall see if it actually happens.
DJ informed me today that if I taught his class in VBS he'd actually stay for the last day. This after stating emphatically, "I HATE the last day!". He also told me "I'm kinda used of you teaching us now". I'm like, wow, it took you five months!
Nadina likes to stretch as far up as she can reach and open our classroom door up, peak in at us with a grin, and quickly run away. DJ, Gin and I all get stupid grins on our faces and say in unison "Dina" in a cute little baby voice. Then we look at each other and smirk because we all did the same thing, we all rise to our feet to go shut the door, look at each other and smirk again, and then Gin goes and closes the door.
It happens at least once a day, you'd think we'd learn!
We were sitting in the class room today and we suddenly heard Nina shouting up the register at us. I listened for a minute and decided that it was unrecognizable jibber-jabber and continued with what I was doing.
Gin however, got a silly grin on her face and said "she's singin' that song". I asked her what song and she said "that, it's your ooown fault, ya went ahead an' did it, song!". I listened for a little longer and discovered that she was right. How many of you have ever tried to teach while listening to "it's your own fault" being yelled full throatedly up the register? DJ found it utterly unbearable and resorted to hollering back down the register at her. I told him if we ignored her she'd go away and he got an "I'm considering this" look on his face and went back to his desk. I was right by the way.
Thing Six ~ I like being right.
The End ~ (As in, nothing comes after this, and the story is over, and all that other good stuff).
Saturday, February 18, 2012
Negative/Positive
DJ did it again yesterday. He looked up and said "I'm being good all day today aren't I?". So I assured him that, yes, he was, because, well, he was. And sitting here tonight it occurred to me that what he needed was confirmation. Confirmation that everything was going good, and that I was happy with him.
People are that way allot I think, when they've messed up it takes a long time to reassure themselves that they can actually achieve and do it right. "It takes hundreds of compliments to build up a persons self esteem, but only one unkind word to take it back down" -Unknown. I know I'm that way. I'm a "words of affirmation" person, or so I've been told, and I believe it, one affirming word can go a long ways for me. I like to know if I did the job right, I like to know if they're happy with the job. And I like a simple, honest, "thank you". It thrills my soul to hear it.
But I swing too far the other way, a hint of aggravation at something I did or said can bother me for a long time. And I tend to mull it over, trying to tell myself that it's okay. But in the back of my head there's still a little voice saying "you really messed up that time, you aren't ever gonna live it down, they're gonna remember that forever". How does a person learn to live above that?
I think for me, the answer is believing their "I forgive you" with just as much trust in the fact that they really do, as the trust I have in them telling the truth when they are thanking or complimenting me.
Why is it so much easier to believe the negative than it is to believe the positive?
People are that way allot I think, when they've messed up it takes a long time to reassure themselves that they can actually achieve and do it right. "It takes hundreds of compliments to build up a persons self esteem, but only one unkind word to take it back down" -Unknown. I know I'm that way. I'm a "words of affirmation" person, or so I've been told, and I believe it, one affirming word can go a long ways for me. I like to know if I did the job right, I like to know if they're happy with the job. And I like a simple, honest, "thank you". It thrills my soul to hear it.
But I swing too far the other way, a hint of aggravation at something I did or said can bother me for a long time. And I tend to mull it over, trying to tell myself that it's okay. But in the back of my head there's still a little voice saying "you really messed up that time, you aren't ever gonna live it down, they're gonna remember that forever". How does a person learn to live above that?
I think for me, the answer is believing their "I forgive you" with just as much trust in the fact that they really do, as the trust I have in them telling the truth when they are thanking or complimenting me.
Why is it so much easier to believe the negative than it is to believe the positive?
Friday, February 10, 2012
I walked into my classroom yesterday prepared for war. My last day of school had been the worst one in the history of ever.
I opened the door and was greeted with lovely new trim all the way around the room.
But that wasn't what I saw first. What I saw first was everything in the room in a very large pile in the middle of the room. The schoolbooks were piled in a red crate and the only thing that really registered with me right away was that the desks were still upright... Well DJ and Ginnys desks were, I couldn't find mine. I found out later that one of the carpenters was standing on it and it had collapsed. I felt bad about that. I should have written "not safe to stand on" on my desk top. It would have fit right in with the "I love you" and the face, and the "FRG", and all the other graffiti that happens to decorate the top of my desk.
I took a quick survey of the room and started stacking cabinets on top of each other and piling Christmas decor into a large cardboard box willy-nilly. I also went inside and found a bucket of hot-soapy-water and a vacuum sweeper. When the girls and I were done re-arranging the room one of the girls informed me that "Kyle's right there". So I poked my head out the door and told him that I'd like him to fix my desk... Which he did, nicely, thank you Kyle.
And then I started to vacuum. I'd done quite a bit of the room till it finally made sense to me why there was a a great cloud of white floating about with the sweeper. The gray tape at the end of the hose was coming undone. (I LOVE gray tape... my one and only pick with it is that they don't seem to make it in pink camo). Anyways I had one of the girls find me a role of the stuff and I fixed the sweeper. And it was no longer accompanied by a lovely white ghost floating along as I swept the floor. By the time I was done I liked the room better than I had before the coming-of-the-carpenters. (A large part of my liking it this way is that my chalkboard is now sitting the right direction and its up at the right hight.)
At ten thirty or so I had finally started school. Their new sound for the day was "sh", slightly ironic considering that my classroom isn't exactly the quietest in the world. It used to be fairly quiet... when I first started, before I discovered that I had larger battles to fight than having a silent battlefield.
The day went very well. At one point DJ looked up at me and smiled "I'm bein' good right now!"... It made my poor soul shake. Maybe I'm a horrid monster of a teacher who aught to be sitting in a dungeon eating bread and water and conversing with the rats. At the end of the day he was hanging on to me around the waist and declaring that he was going to keep me there forever and I had several other children clamoring about how "that one was SHORT, can't you read another one!?"... So I decided that maybe I don't need to worry about learning rat-speak anytime soon.
Lily asked me at the beginning of the day if I felt like my life was in an uproar when I went there. I smiled and shook my head. I don't, I like being there, I like teaching, I like children. I like feeling like I'm doing something profitable. And I like challenges that I can be in control of and conquer. I enjoyed cleaning that room up.... I knew I could do it, and I did. I wonder how often life's challenges are not conquered simply because we don't take control of them. We look at them and think, "As soon as somebody will give me directions I'll try but I'm not making any promises". When is it our responsibility to take responsibility?
Quote of the Day:
"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." -Philippians 4:13
I opened the door and was greeted with lovely new trim all the way around the room.
But that wasn't what I saw first. What I saw first was everything in the room in a very large pile in the middle of the room. The schoolbooks were piled in a red crate and the only thing that really registered with me right away was that the desks were still upright... Well DJ and Ginnys desks were, I couldn't find mine. I found out later that one of the carpenters was standing on it and it had collapsed. I felt bad about that. I should have written "not safe to stand on" on my desk top. It would have fit right in with the "I love you" and the face, and the "FRG", and all the other graffiti that happens to decorate the top of my desk.
I took a quick survey of the room and started stacking cabinets on top of each other and piling Christmas decor into a large cardboard box willy-nilly. I also went inside and found a bucket of hot-soapy-water and a vacuum sweeper. When the girls and I were done re-arranging the room one of the girls informed me that "Kyle's right there". So I poked my head out the door and told him that I'd like him to fix my desk... Which he did, nicely, thank you Kyle.
And then I started to vacuum. I'd done quite a bit of the room till it finally made sense to me why there was a a great cloud of white floating about with the sweeper. The gray tape at the end of the hose was coming undone. (I LOVE gray tape... my one and only pick with it is that they don't seem to make it in pink camo). Anyways I had one of the girls find me a role of the stuff and I fixed the sweeper. And it was no longer accompanied by a lovely white ghost floating along as I swept the floor. By the time I was done I liked the room better than I had before the coming-of-the-carpenters. (A large part of my liking it this way is that my chalkboard is now sitting the right direction and its up at the right hight.)
At ten thirty or so I had finally started school. Their new sound for the day was "sh", slightly ironic considering that my classroom isn't exactly the quietest in the world. It used to be fairly quiet... when I first started, before I discovered that I had larger battles to fight than having a silent battlefield.
The day went very well. At one point DJ looked up at me and smiled "I'm bein' good right now!"... It made my poor soul shake. Maybe I'm a horrid monster of a teacher who aught to be sitting in a dungeon eating bread and water and conversing with the rats. At the end of the day he was hanging on to me around the waist and declaring that he was going to keep me there forever and I had several other children clamoring about how "that one was SHORT, can't you read another one!?"... So I decided that maybe I don't need to worry about learning rat-speak anytime soon.
Lily asked me at the beginning of the day if I felt like my life was in an uproar when I went there. I smiled and shook my head. I don't, I like being there, I like teaching, I like children. I like feeling like I'm doing something profitable. And I like challenges that I can be in control of and conquer. I enjoyed cleaning that room up.... I knew I could do it, and I did. I wonder how often life's challenges are not conquered simply because we don't take control of them. We look at them and think, "As soon as somebody will give me directions I'll try but I'm not making any promises". When is it our responsibility to take responsibility?
Quote of the Day:
"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." -Philippians 4:13
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
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